After my (59m) divorce from my wife 5 years younger, I dated a woman 10 years younger for 10 years. After our split, I took some time off and when it felt right, I joined a dating app.

I actually matched with a girl (22f) which scared me a little at first. I assumed she swiped me accidentally. But apparently not.

We chatted for a bit on the app, then FaceTimed for an hour, then met at a bar the following weekend.

She was attractive with long dark hair, tall (5’7), very fit and very smart.

For reference, on our first date, we did draw some attention. So we openly asked the bartender what he thought our ages were. He guessed me at 45 and her at 32. So visually we appeared better together than our actual ages.

She told me she was tired of guys her age and just wanted a mature guy, who was in shape, who she was attracted to and who could have an intelligent conversation.

I happened to fit the bill.

She lived 45 minutes away from me which actually helped. She wanted her home life and time with me to be separate.

We both agreed that our relationship wouldn’t be forever. She wanted to be married and to have kids and she also told me her family wouldn’t approve of our relationship.

She also made it clear that we were not exclusive. She wanted to be able to date guys if she met any. But, she said she wanted to be able to turn down having sex with any of them. It was my job to fulfill that need. That way, she’d only be sleeping with one guy.

We dated every weekend for over two months. She would always make the drive to my house. During that time we had a lot of fun. We had nice dinners and did many fun things that she normally couldn’t do with younger, non-established guys.

At one point, she told me that I was perfect in every way except for my age. She said she preferred that her future husband be at most 10 years older than her. But she said if I was at least 40, should would consider a long term relationship with me.

After a few more dates, she texted me and told me she couldn’t see me anymore. She said that she was developing feelings that she didn’t want to have. And being the smart girl that she was, decided it was best to stop seeing me. I respected her decision.

I truly enjoyed my time with her and I’m glad she passed through my life. I wish it would have lasted longer but am thankful for the experience.

We still text randomly just to check in, but that has become less and less.

If nothing else, I’ve learned that an age gap really doesn’t matter. We got along just fine and truly enjoyed each other’s company. But I do attribute it mostly to her old soul and intelligence. She didn’t act or come across as a 22 year old girl at all.

I missed having her around a lot at first, but that has faded quite a bit.

I dated a few women after her ranging from 25 to 62. So I don’t actively look for younger.

Right now I spend most of my time with a lady who is 55 years old. She appears much younger and could easily pass for 45. We’ve been dating for over a month and actually have not even had sex yet.

I’m still not sure what I want out of life. Not sure if I want to be married or not. I’m just enjoying dating and spending time with good people.

There is no rush.