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5
sana wala na lang akong tatay
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This might appear insensitive to some, pero tangina, sana 'di na lang ako nagkaron ng tatay.

I have a man in my household (I refuse to call him father anymore) na physically there pero emotionally present lang kapag galit siya. Mararamdaman mo lang siya kapag wala syang sigarilyo, 'di nasunod bisyo nya, o kaya kapag 'di sya napaghain o naipaglaba. Mararamdaman ko lang na may lalaki sa bahay kapag may nasira na syang gamit, kapag umiyak na yung nanay ko, kapag may umalingawngaw na na sigaw sa bahay.

Ganyan lang lagi scenario nya sa bahay; ang magalit. Kaya tangina, wala na akong pakialam kung mapunta man ako sa impyerno pero araw-araw ko wini-wish na sana mamatay na sya. Na sana maaksidente sya at mabagok ang ulo, o 'di kaya sana may biglang sumaksak sa kanya, o kaya sana mag-decide na lang sya na tapusin yung buhay nya. Wala na akong pakialam if you people call me cold-hearted or masamang anak or whatever. Mas masama syang tao and mas cold-hearted sya.

Tapos kanina, tangina, he dared say na wala akong mararating sa buhay just because mabagal akong maligo? Putangina nya. Bakit, siya ba, ano bang narating nya sa buhay? Ano, maging adik? Maging manloloko? Maging walang kwentang tatay? Tangina nya, ang kapal ng mukha niyang magsalita pero siya wala namang narating.

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Posted
1 week ago