Ang hirap pala to make conscious efforts to stop with the unhealthy coping mechanisms and to actually start facing my problems. Sobrang tagal ko rin tumakbo after a traumatic incident in 2021. Lumala ung paggamit ko ng alcohol to cope, even started smoking, tried illegal drugs, and the worst of it all, the meaningless sex with random strangers just to feel better and distract myself from the pain.

Sunod sunod na bad decisions talaga and now na mas self aware na ako I’m trying very hard not to go back to what I was used to. Sobrang hirap lalo na on nights like this na nasisiraan na naman ako ng ulo mag-isa and I can’t really talk to anyone hahahahahaha. I think my friends don’t understand what I’m going through and nagiging sympathy instead of empathy lang kaya I chose not to open up. Sana mag work ung therapy kasi ang mahal HAHAHAHA ayun lang. Mageeffort na talaga ako ayusin buhay ko, please lang wala muna sanang sisira ng peace na meron rn hahahahahaha bye