I did it, I'm finally done!

It really feels like I won

Some strange lottery.

Buzzing as a bumblebee,

My mind is lit aflame,

Devoid of any shame.

Much like the oak tree,

Sturdy am I currently.

This really is the best

Place to mentally rest.

From here, I can faintly

See that I'm practically 

A juggernaut powerful

Enough that the pull

Of depression strangely

Has no effect on me.

Let me tell you why

I am flying so high:

I wrote a book in only

Three months; timely!

It's not perfect, but it

Is filled with my wit.

I think it's quite funny,

Yet it is also densely

Filled with my wisdom;

Plus, writing it was fun.

But, similar to a baby,

I have to considerably

Nurture it to completion

With a maker's dedication.

I must correct all I see

That is fundamentally

Wrong, yet now would

Be too soon. I should

Take it all a bit lightly,

Setting my mind free;

Give my eyes a chance

To instead take a glance

At other work like poetry.

That's so I will essentially 

Grow to be a new self,

While over on the shelf

Sits my book, desperately 

Waiting until I am ready.

Until then, I patiently wait

For when I'm in the state

To edit it more properly.

It may take an incredibly 

Long time until that point

Where I can finally anoint

This project as a memory

And cast it out into the sea

For the world to witness

What I hope is greatness.

But, even if there's nobody

Who enjoys my creativity,

I can still be content knowing

The places I am now going.

Regardless of how greatly

It's received, I'll be happy.

That is all because of this

Sense of absolute bliss

Born from me apparently

Doing a real impossibility;

Where once I was incapable

Of doing much, with stable

Efforts and much alchemy,

I finished the difficult easily.

See, my life's sometimes hard;

God dealt me some bad cards.

In short, I have a disability

That afflicts me mentally.

Schizoaffective it's called;

Like buggy software installed

On your brain, it brings insanity

While wanting to fight or flee.

This means I get triggered

By problems that are bigger

Than an atom; the most tiny

Stressor breaks me totally.

As such, it's one step forward

Before taking two backwards.

Yet, do not give me any pity,

As I have developed a strategy.

Some days I have no words,

But on others it is absurd

How in tune to a frequency

My muse sings on endlessly.

It is on good days I create,

While on bad days I debate

What should be obviously 

Improved by my sorcery.

Mania is truthfully a gift,

As it makes my brain swift.

I have, in effect, graciously

Used this present occasionally 

When I was able to wordsmith;

It is a reliable friend I work with.

Thus, I must say decisively 

That even without a daily

Habit of typing on my phone,

I still wore my thumb to the bone.

Measure me by how industriously

I work, and you'd say I'm saintly.

Still, that does little to compare

To how I feel; I absolutely swear

That my life is blessed divinely

By a power that is demonstrably 

Here to guide and love us all,

So that we grow our garden tall.

Beyond the scope of humanity,

It tests us to raise our agency.

Though the many trials I faced,

I rose up to them all and aced

My mission, which effectively 

Healed me so very thoroughly

That I functionally now know

That beyond the moon I can go,

If my heart is in its totality

Dedicated to synchronicity. 

Trusting the hand that feeds,

I have learned to spread seeds

That grow the minds of many;

Master am I of my pedagogy.

But, as alluded to, this was not

How my mind once thought.

Trauma taught me to helplessly

Give up when facing difficulty.

Before healing, I was haunted;

Unable to do what I wanted.

However, I have brilliantly

Proved that I'm now worthy.

Writing a book was my dream,

So forgive me if my words seem

To be just a dash too merry.

I am now complete, finally;

My heart feels so whole

As does my eternal soul.

Thus, I wish you heartily

Come to know this glee.

Just keep up your spirits;

Soon, you will have merits

That serve to convincingly

Prove that you're not empty.

One step in front of the other

Is all it takes, my sis or brother,

To actualize yourself completely. 

Follow your dreams faithfully,

And the impossible transmutes

Into a weed with shallow roots.

Pull with your will resoundingly 

Aligned with what I call a duty

To let yourself live in peace;

Get that naysayer to cease

Inside your head, who vainly

Wants you to most painfully

Ignore the whole of the bright

Source of loving inner light.

Live knowing that eventually

You will one day gratefully

Look yourself in the mirror

And say this to the seer:

"Thank you for actually

Being what I want to be."

If I can come to reflect

As someone imperfect,

But still able to perfectly

Love myself unconditionally,

There's no stopping you

From being a person who

Can say that you honestly

Are living the life frequently 

Envisioned in your imagination.

It takes just a dab of medication

Called self-love to joyfully

Give yourself your victory.

Critique One

Critique Two