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Sunset-pink skin,
soft, tender flesh.
The sweetest peach
had a bitter black pit,
that clung to flesh
refusing its caress.
I took care of the tree
from where it grew.
Watering the roots
with everything blue.
Flowers of spring
spelled out harvests
that came every June.
But no buds bloomed,
no matter what I'd do.
Suspended in time,
the fruit never grew
As seasons flew by,
the soil stayed dry.
Winter shivers came,
and I lost memories
of that sweet fruit.
What had remained
was a withered heart,
wishing I could find
this peach of mine.
Looking for feedback on rhyme scheme, flow, and whatever sticks out as "off" or could be improved. All feedback is valuable to me!
Comments:
https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/193btij/the_running_light/kh9386v/
https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/193cscp/gloves_on/kh92c3a/
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- 10 months ago
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