It’s not easy.

I used to enjoy sex. I used to date a lot.

I had a serious STD scare when one of my “swinging girlfriends” sent me an email saying she was STD positive. I caught HPV and HSV2 from her, but nothing “serious”.

It was a traumatic few years, but that was the turning point that sent my health phobias into overdrive.

Not only do I now constantly fear contamination (I hide it very well) - I am constantly worried about sex.

I made my last partner take a test and show me her negative results, but then my OCD brain constantly attacks me by theorizing that she was lying, and that I’ll get betrayed again.

Hard to date if you’re that guy with a sex contamination phobia. Ugh.

I do still date, but I often “break up” before things get too close or if I don’t trust the girl’s “vibes”. Pretty sure the rejected think I’m gay now.