the show jane the virgin, her grandma says sum like “you’ll never know he is the right guy if you dont tell him that youre saving yourself” type thing.

im fresh out of an abusive relationship and i have a daughter so im not thinking about dating any time soon but when i do, i plan to be super careful. my ex seemed like the perfect guy when we first met only for him to turn out to be the actual worst person ive ever met… so this makes me feel like i could be easily fooled again and i dont want that to happen.

obviously im not a virgin so this isnt about virginity it’s just about whether or not holding out on sex till marriage (or a long period of time that shows the seriousness of the relationship) is a reliable way to tell if a man is really committed to you and loves you.