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Why do certain people take criticism bad and act defensive ?
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Long story short, ive known this guy for about 7/8 months and we met at the library and have a lot in common. We got really close in a short period of time due to me basically talking about my traumas to him and so forth. He later began being more open and would share some private stuff with me especially around the girl he's seeing privately.

Today in conversation, I just mentioned how he has some things to work on as a general comment when we were talking about some stuff and he took it offensive. I also mentioned how he just looks like he doesn't look like he apologizes easily and he brought up a pretty weak argument on a time he apologized for 1 thing he did recently.

I immediately apologized when I saw He really got agitated by my comment and he then got even more agitated because he said I just apologized because I don't want to hurt his feelings. I said yes that's partly true but im also sorry about making that assumption I made as I was wrong. He kept dodging the question on when I said he has some things to work on (by the way, this is the first time I gave him some sort of constructive feedback, every time before this I always gave him positive things about him).

I saw a side of him I didn't like and he assumed I was acting this way bc I wanted to "make him angry". He said "you just apologized and act like its all done with and thats not acceptable. You have to listen to what i have to say after apologzing" . Out of fear of making this issue worse, I told him ok i will do that next time if thats what you need to get past this and he seemed bitter with my answer. Advice ?

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Posted
4 weeks ago