I left NoFap almost two years ago, maybe more (I can't really remember properly), the reason being that it was destroying my mental health. I had/still have a porn addiction, and so obviously I would fail, or "break my streak" very often. But as someone who really wants to change this dependency, it was extremely demoralizing to fail, and it would throw me into a depressed, self-hatred period everytime it happened.

So I stopped trying altogether. I made PMO a very normal part of my life, to the point that there was pretty much only two or three times when I had a 3 day streak due to "forgetting" to masturbate. (What I mean is, I was too busy/too occupied with something else to really let my mind wander to porn)

I started getting into more and more extreme porn. I stopped having boundaries as to where I would let myself jack off. I would do it at home in the middle of the day, at work, at other people's houses, etc. It was getting gross.

This year, however, I got very excited for No Nut November. I was so sure I could do it this time; I really wanted NNN to be the thing that fixed my addiction. Not surprisingly, I failed pretty early on. So I got depressed again, since I'm no longer "eligible" to win NNN this year. I really don't want to wait a full year before trying again, I want to do it now when millions of guys around the world are united together to abstain for a month.

Then I remembered NoFap. I remembered how here there is no set time of year that we try not to engage in PMO. When a streak is broken, we can (and are encouraged to) immediately start the challenge again. There is no limit, and you can try as many times as you want.

I love the vibe of the NNN community; it's very fun, lighthearted, and entertaining. I'm sad it's only once a year. But I now realize that NoFap is much more stable, more readily available, and I have realized once again in my life that I need this. I need to stop, if not forever, at least for extended periods of time. If I feel that I get enough encouragement and feeling of brotherhood from this group, then I feel like I can finally break my two-week record of no PMO since my addiction started. I think I can do it. I want to join you guys again.

I'm back.