For starters, I'm a 21 year old male college student.

My Background

In High School I was addicted to porn. It all began with the hackneyed story of seeing 1 nude picture, and transitioning thence to bikini pics, nude photos, lewd videos, and more obscene material. Oddly, for 4 years I only watched soft porn (no sex, merely nudity) and during that time never masturbated, either out of ignorance or disgust. Over that time I was desensitized to nude photos of women, and became shameful of my actions and quit. I had minor relapses here and there, but not ever enough to lure me back into its clutches.

Approximately 30 days ago, unhappy with my job, I got curious, and jerked a dry one. I felt gross afterward. I decided to explore further, surprisingly finding I was aroused by porn again if only for the fact that I had some part of me to activate. And that's when I started watching real sex. It felt weird, illicit, and I did it late at night in my backyard or midday in the darkened garage. For 30 days, I explored this part of myself and nearly everyday did the deed. I am now at college.

My Intentions

I am trying to quit now, but I realize since I've never done it before and now have, my libido will change in ways I've never seen it before, and if I abstain for at least a week or more, some strange and wonderful side effects may transpire. Whenever I masturbate, my ability to focus plummets and I feel a soulless emptiness inhabit me. As I embark on this journey, I'd be blessed to know what will happen to my body, how might my emotions alter, and how the experience of quitting masturbation will differ from having never done it at all. My guess is that my body will now have a taste for women, and spark my attraction levels. My libido might finally recover. I may experience some withdrawal I am anticipating that. Any advice would be helpful.

My Circumstances & How to Quit

As of now, my college WiFi disallows viewing porn sites (or proxy servers to circumvent them), and I lent my restrictions password to my roommate who disabled Safari and the App Store (lest I download Chrome). My headphones don't connect to my laptop either (I was addicted to YouTube too), so the only way to view lewd material is to lock myself in some secluded bathroom, spawn a WiFi Hotspot from my phone, connect and stream the sex aloud from my laptop, itself perched atop a musty restroom trash can. I did this today, and it was terribly inconvenient, contrived, and unnecessary. But the human body will do that for sex. With much hassle, I've tried to exclude this from my life and this is the last avenue, which I cannot eliminate directly. Otherwise, I find myself unable to get it on do to the sheer difficulty and the roadblocks I've managed. What should I do? What can I tell myself? I fear this will be my resort.