I didn’t have my first sexual experience till 23. Like no masturbation, no 🌽, I hadn’t even had a girlfriend. But my sexual urge eventually started to surface and I intentionally started searching for shows/movies that would have sex scenes. Then one day I searched some 🌽 and got hooked. When it started I felt soooooo guilty. Felt like crap. But then my lust would come back and I’d start watching again. Because I was raised VERY religious, for the first few months I would watch 🌽, I would not even touch my 🍆 . I figured as long as I 💦 without touching myself, I was good. Well, eventually I gave in and for the last 3 years I probably yank it probably 3 times a week. I hate that this is what I resort to for a sexual release. And when I watch 🌽, the stuff is soooooooo cringey. Like the acting is bad, the scenarios are unrealistic, and the fake moaning. I mean…..Jesus, they sound like idiots. But…..this is the only sexual release I have. I know I would feel better if I quit. But I to this day I have never had nor been close to getting into a relationship. I went 23 years without knowing what it feels like to orgasm. And the idea of going back to that doesn’t sound fun to me. You are probably reading all this and thinking “Bro….just go ask a girl out.” But I am not an attractive guy. I’m heavy set and even in high school I knew my facial features weren’t appealing.

I have a good job and am living well so life really is good. But it bugs me that I have to resort to such a crude thing for my sexual wants you know. So my question for ya’ll is this. How do you change your mindset so you don’t think the “No Fap” life is just this orgasm-less experience where you don’t at least feel like crap for watching 🌽