Hi! I’ve been skating since Feb 2023, so it’s almost been a year and a half. I can land shovits, pop-shovits, ollie up 40 cm (~16 inch) boxes, BS boardslides, and am in the process of learning kickflips.

I noticed that I face some issues that my peers at the skatepark don’t. For instance, I can now do BS boardslides more or less consistently (check my second most recent post on this sub—I’ve improved since then), but whenever I show up at the skatepark (and that’s most days), I can’t hit the rail on first try. I always have to gradually work towards it. It used to take me twenty minutes to just jump onto the rail, now it’s around 5 minutes, but I still haven’t shown up to the skatepark and directly landed a BS boardslide first try. It’s almost as if I magically “forget” how to do it overnight and have to relearn it each time.

My friends told me that I can totally do it on a taller rail, coz it’s “easier” and it’s “the same thing”… But I just can’t commit to get on it. I realised that I have a LOT of fear in me, so whenever I have to do something, I’m always fighting my inner fears, so to speak. I know this is true, to some degree, for everyone, but in my case it takes a very long time, hours even, to just convince myself.

A friend of mine noticed me trying to get onto the rail and he was like, “But you can already get on them, I’ve seen you.” So now I’m wondering whether its normal to still need some time at the start of every sesh to just get onto it, and why it’s taking me such a long time to do them effortlessly right at the start. I really want to move onto taller rails but I think that I’ll spend most of the sesh just trying to get on them 😭 and probably failing and being frustrated for the rest of the day!

The most embarrassing thing: drop-ins. I can do them on the miniramp with the help of a friend. If he “spots” me for the first couple tries, I’ll be able to do many drop ins for the rest of the sesh. However, when he isn’t there, it takes me AGES standing on top of the ramp trying to work up the courage. Although I know I’ve dropped in before, I still can’t bring myself to do it. And everytime I come back to the skatepark, I still have to start from scratch—all the courage I gathered the day prior has suddenly disappeared (it never lasts!). Today, I stood there for very long but I wasn’t able to drop in at all. Drop-ins are generally the first thing new skaters learn, and they can do them effortlessly after a few seshes. I’ve been skating for a year and a half (!) and am still struggling! (Although, admittedly, I don’t try them often enough—I’ve started in February and only do them every two-three weeks… I just find them too scary!)

I’m starting to think that this is a me-thing. Other people learn the basic motion for slides and quickly move on to taller and taller rails. In my case, I’m stuck at the same 2 rails and every time I still need to work toward them. And, for drop-ins, I don’t think I’ll ever learn them. When I manage to pull them off, after a good night’s sleep, I’ll come back to the skatepark, stand in front of the drop again, and be as scared as I was before.

I’m not seeking validation or anything… This is an actual concern I’ve been having for the past few weeks!! Especially seeing my other friends learn stuff quicker and quicker… and I’ve been stuck on boardslides as my most recent trick since May!

PS: I still have loads of fun and love skating though! And I would never quit!!

TL;DR – I get too scared to do stuff, more than my peers do. And I think this makes my skate progression way slower and more psychologically taxing.