It’s been 8 years and I’m still struggling with how school made me feel. My case manager probably had no real training in handling kids with trauma or undiagnosed mental illnesses because she basically just made me feel bad about how I was coping or struggling with school. She was initially my (special education)math teacher in 6th grade, but in her classroom she basically just mishandled the misfits and tried telling us how to do math once a week. Her classroom dn’t really feel like a conducive learning environment.

I enjoyed sitting in tight cubbies one of her rooms had in it. I think it was extra shelving space. But that little cubby was safe and quiet.

She made me feel like I was mentally ill (not just a lil spicy either)for it and that I was a ..(less than respectful word that starts with R)well yeah. I remember in my IEP meeting she looked around the room and at staff/my mom and said it wasn’t normal and that was a sign that I was behind my peers.

I still enjoy tight cubby spaces. I still feel safe in dark crowded cubbies. I know it’s okay now but I still feel uncomfortable too.

Guess I’m still struggling🥺