When I was 18, I went a few months without masturbating because of how bad it was supposed to be as described in the publications and meetings. I remember a public talk where the elder said to do anything you can to keep your mind off of it and joked that it could be the reason why one unmarried brother may have the most well-maintained lawn in the neighborhood. Abstaining was really hard until finally I couldn’t hold out any longer. It was such a cathartic release, yet I also felt a sense of shame like I had committed some grave sin especially since I had succeeded in resisting for so long. I debated in my mind if I should go to the elders about this but ultimately decided it would only harm my standing in the congregation. Besides, I thought this was an issue between me and Jehovah and had nothing to do with the elders even though we’re told we’re supposed to go to them for these sorts of things. The whole internal struggle was tormenting. The effort spent thinking about not doing it was surely worse than if I had just done it and not thought about it much.

Now having been out a long time, it saddens me that religion makes people feel a disproportionate amount of shame for things that are normal and natural. This post, gratuitously, is just an expression against this shame.