(Allow me some leeway as to what our situationship is like - we know full well its not classic cuck/bull/stag lines and a perhaps a lor more murky. Anyways the point that I am trynna make still holds)

The very first time after my girlfriend lets call, her M, broke up, We had both been seeing other people for a couple or so months. So when we finally got back to to hooking up, for the first time since the break- At some point in night she comments 'You Kiss different" now. somehow

Of course.. I suppose, how can one not... but quite profound if you think about it .. But that is just starters

So, we generally have had good if not always great sex.. Like I know she prefers my girth, size, feels, thrust that kind of thing. Given this apparent position of, power, if you will, i don't really probe re her current dude. But I know she looks forward to our meetup as much as is it for friendship and catchups, but to fuck fuck fuck primarily.

And the sex has been mind-blowing really- raunchy after party sex, messy love hotel crashes and fuckin. on hours on molly candy and the likes. its like we go back to college like hormones. Like its top notch - because we are so familiar and comfortable... I suppose that would be the logic if we are trynna rationalize

But what doesn't quite track is - I am able to do things that I was totally awkward or unable to do when we were together - like my entire frame of what's 'rough' is or can be - totally, totally reframed. She gives amazing head. I could never really maneuver her head and make the mouth mine (which obviously is with consent) but a few days back I came like after a long time and just because I held her head down she swallowed like a gazillion liters of my finest. It was very erotic moment that seemed to unfold over a reallyy long time lol, I defaulted back to my caring apologetic face even before the final drip was swallowed -we burst out laughing

There are so many other occasions that I can pull from that is directly better because of whatever the other half of her life is. And in a self contained thought experiment it is very fascinating

Would love to hear how others have experienced in this context