A few days ago, my (23 M) wife (29 F) went on a trip with a "rich" guy. While being with him, she tried to manipulate me into accepting her conditions on our marriage, else threatened to leave me for him. Of course I did not accept and cried, literally screamed until my voice was gone, asked her for the truth (where she is, with whom she is) and she very peacefully did not want to. . She gave no **** about it and eventually blocked and unblocked me. She said she isn't cheating on me (said she can take a lie detector test if I want to and that they sleep in different rooms), but that she used him to pay for her vacation, as she wanted a break from our quarreling and madness that happens home. Said she's ok with a divorce.

She returned and admitted that she said that he wants her just to make me jealous because she was mad at me because of how our constant fights, but that between them wasn't anything like that. That he accepted to pay for her vacation with no benefits at all. She repeatedly insisted that she takes a lie detector test if that would make me calm down and that there hasn't been any cheating and as such her conscience is clear. However this IS cheating for me. At the end she agreed to gave me his number, although I was asking for it just to see her reaction. Well, that's the story. Now I'm gonna list all the red flags I've noticed:

-During most of our fights, I'm the one who is at fault;

-I think she is manipulating me constantly, that she knows what buttons to press (she knows I'm co-dependent, so she always makes threats like "Do you want me to disappear from your life?" or she is returning the engagement ring when we are having an argument) and does so purposefully;

-Has no respect for me, if we agree on something she may not respect it (for example: we go to X at Y hour), if I want to ask for advice from someone she says I'm not a real man and that I live from someone else's advises. When we had some intimate issues (for some reason I cannot finish with her) she asked one of her exes if their sex was okay and the list can continue.

-When she's apologizing, I just...do not feel the emotion. She's like "sorry for making you upset, I did not mean to". But that's it...like food without salt.

-Now, after she returned, obviously I'm still in an emotional wreck. I told her I feel anger at her, I hate her and at the same time I love her, I feel upset that I could not do anything to prevent this and that I'm feeling hurt and betrayed. She however admitted that it's her fault. Instead of helping me, she says I should let it go and that she's always on her nerves because I keep asking her questions and pushing her so hard on this. Let me cite her "I also want to somehow live normally more or less ... think about a new hairstyle .. I’d love life, but I find it very difficult to even breathe with you .. I’m always on my nerves .." because I keep asking her about what happened and asked for her emotional support. Received almost 0. I just feel that she's unable to post herself in other people's shoes. When I asked her about it, she said "I think I can, but since we are all different, I won't be able to feel the same way as you do".

So, I think she might be a covert narc due to her manipulation tactics and seemingly lack of empathy. However what contradicts it is that sometimes she showed that she cared for me. Maybe it's me the crazy one, that's what I began to tell myself. I'm lost. I need advises.