YOUR FORMER PENPAL Handjob Extraordinaire

Enthusiastic 5’3/170 single female in her 30s who enjoys combining handjobs with control. I’d like to break you down and build you back up again with my hands.

EDUCATION Bachelors in Dickspection 2023

JANUARY 2023 - PRESENT - I make people laugh so you don’t have to. - Talented at edging men. - Proficient in small talk. - Hands on listener. - Natural interrupter. - CPR certified in making your dick come to life.

WHY YOU SHOULD MESSAGE ME I need the continuing education credits. Not mandatory, I’d also like to integrate your toys into the play.

REFERENCES Available upon request.

Please reach out with age, location, if you’re single, and if you host. Conversing is mandatory before, during, and after. Definitely practice good hygiene. One time I made out with someone who had horrible breath and it messed me up forever. I prefer men in their 20s-late 30s in Manhattan, Hoboken, or JC.

How I’d review myself from the guy’s POV.

“I messaged her because I needed a little fun in my life, but all she caused was stress and chaos. I still came though—all she had to do was shut up.” (I chose all the wrong topics to talk about and none of them were very conducive for a handjob. Yikes. If you give me another chance, let’s have evangelion play in the background...)

“I bribed her with continental breakfast but apparently I wasn’t worth the four hour commute. Is this what happens when you interact with a girl from Jersey?”

“I asked her to meet up with me, and the day of the meetup I deleted my account.” (my spooky reddit ghost story.)

“She saw the ouija board placed near my bed which was “just” “a” “coincidence.” I didn’t have the planchette but she still asked me to flip it over.” (I DIDNT want to invite anything unwelcome into my dick exorcism but just in case, can I use his dick to say goodbye?)

my POV. I felt introspective as we talked about our lives—past and present. This was a different type of vulnerable, and I felt very moved before, during, and after our encounter. Thanks for fulfilling my introspective cuddling post.