Question for everyone. Im coming to terms with the fact that i genuinely cannot form my own sustained joy. It doesnt matter, after all certain amount of time it will bored me and ill lose interest. Joy is just unsustainable, even when everything is going my way and i have what i need. Ill have days where I’m satisfied and fine but it always comes to an end, undoubtedly i will find something to pick at. Im not a fan of it but its also not something i have any control over. Ill be in a relationship with an amazing girl who just dotes on me and everything is the way i want it and suddenly i wake up and am absolutely repulsed. No reason, nothing has changed.

Im curious if those that feel similarly have given up on true long term joy and happiness or are you still striving towards it? Pleasure seems to be easier to get and works for me, i want real sustained happiness but i just dont know if its even an option for me. If i cant then whats the point of trying? Pleasure is just easier, im not interested in easier though.