New Muslima here seeking input from my other brothers and sisters, specially married ones but all are welcome to chat about this.

I was at the mall with my husband. We were walking by these shops with window displays and I noticed that there was a male mannequin, that looked like my husband. I pointed it out and jokingly told him that he looks so much like you. My husband agreed that yes he does and then he posed for a picture in front of it.

This mannequin was wearing a jacket, and I wanted to buy this jacket for my husband. He looked at the price and said, "Too expensive! We are not getting it." I told him that I will buy it from my money and he did not want me to spend that much on his clothing. He was very resistant because he likes to dress very simple and he believes that men who spend high amounts of money on their upkeep are "metro-sexuals."

The term is used for a man who spends so much money on fashion that people may consider him to be gay. My husband thinks that high end brands like Gucci and Dior are for gay men and the Sunnah is to dress simple. While this jacket was manly (otherwise I would not choose for him,) the price tag on it was making him feel "metro."

Furthermore, he also did not want me to spend money on his clothing because he believes that according to the Quran, men and the providers and maintainers of women so a man should buy for a woman. He expects his wife to just cook something nice when I feel like pampering him but he normally discourages it when I spend money on him. This I find to be not cool because Alhamdulillah I make almost as much money as he does and since he is my husband, I should have the right to buy things for him and to sometimes dress him the way I like.

So we started arguing and he was insisting that if I have to buy anything then I should just buy something small. We had an argument and finally he told me that he is the man of the house and the ameer, so when it comes to financial matters I should listen to him. I told him that I am the woman of the house and I will dress up my ameer the way I like. Besides this is my money and when we married he told me that he will have no say over my money. Now he was telling me what to do with my money.

I argued back quite assertively, and if you saw us there you would never guess that this is in fact a "love fight." People were looking at us like we were having a real confrontational argument and when he saw that I am not budging, and this is creating a scene, He surrendered. I got him the jacket and also other "metro-sexual" things, which he now loves because he feels sincere love behind it all.

But I sometimes feel that he wants the gift exchanges to be one sided. I asked my married Muslim friends and they told me that Muslim men sometimes feel that their masculinity is being challenged when a woman spends money on them. My husband is a very confident man and I do not believe that he has that "insecurity complex" because he has helped me so much with my career. I am convinced that he just wanted the money to be there for me because he cares.

How would other brothers feel if your wife wanted to spend on you? And sisters ... do you feel that my husbands behavior is typical of other Muslims husbands? Thanks.