I'm Bengali and we have something called joutuk, which is a "reverse" dowry the groom pays to the bride, which is usually spent on her bridal clothes and jewellery, and sometimes her immediate family wedding outfits. When I ask a Muslim Bengali what a mehr is (I am unmarried), they say it is money paid to the wife after a divorce. However, when I hear Middle-Easterns and other South Asians talk about mehr, it sounds as if they're talking about a reverse dowry. So which is it?

Additional question: How does cultural dowries run alongside mahr? In other South Asian countries, the "jahez" is paid to the groom. Is mahr an Islamic requirement? Do some Muslims not pay mahr? Do the groom and/or the bride pay both the joutuk/jahez at the same time as mahr?

edit: bridal dowry.