i've been identifying nb for quite some years now, writing a lot of things off as "oh i just feel more comfortable when i'm further removed from my masculinity" and never thinking too much harder on it. well, i thought harder on it. a lot harder. and here i am now, mid crisis for the past couple weeks as i realise just how much dysphoria i've actually been feeling about my body and how people continue to perceive me as a man.

there's still a lot of stuff i'm unpacking there and elsewhere, but there's one thing that keeps coming back to me which absolutely fills me with dread and fear: the fact that i've got a really receded hairline. i'm going to be talking to my doctor in the near future about the possibility of regrowing my hair, but i'm not confident since it started receding pretty badly about... 7? 8? years ago now. it's to the point where shaving my head was the only way i could even feel vaguely comfortable with myself. i think i'm open to the idea of wigs, but i have really bad hyperhydrosis on my head that already gives me pretty intense anxiety, which in a cruel kind of irony only makes me sweat more. i really worry about that getting in the way of a wig properly adhering, and the thought of it just... sliding off kills me.

so what kinda options do i have here? should i just try my best to lean into it and find bald/shaved head femme fashion that works for me? any examples of that, or any experiences people can share would be much appreciated, cause i'm very much at a loss for how to overcome this fear.