Hello my fellow sisters, I'm posting this question today because I feel conflicted and I don't know how to go about this. For context, I(FTM) am in the st4t relationship. My wife and I have both been transitioning nearly at the same time.

Anyhow, the scoop is that my wife thinks her voice passes as a girl who's chainsmoked too much. I on one hand, don't think it does. She hasn't voice trained but she passes physically and I think she should feel confident about that. However, I don't think it's right for me to say that her voice passes when it doesn't.

She tells me that sometimes strangers keep ID'ing her even after she talks. However, from my observations when we're in public, she's consistently "sir"ed when she talks femininely. When we have discussions about her voice, she tells me that I only think it doesn't pass because I've lived with her for too long and am too critical, which I think is a possibility.

So please, my sisters, give me advice on whether or not I should just tell her her voice passes when I think it doesn't so she doesn't feel dysphoric about it, or should I stay honest and tell her when it doesn't (and yes, I have been encouraging her to go to voice therapy).

Thanks.