I've tried thinking of the best way to write this and what might get the most attention/intrigue, but settle on being honest and hopeful the sincerity will reach the right person. So apologies of this goes a little long...

I have been single for quite some time. I mean, longer than I'd like to admit. I have always been a 'girlfriend guy.' However, my last relationship left me very apprehensive to get into a relationship again. My ex had a lot of previous trauma that was brought into our relationship and deeply affected me. I developed anxiety and depression, two things I had never had to deal with in the past, and it hit me hard. That coupled with being in a job I despised, I nearly broke. I lost my passions, I lost my spirit, and I lost myself.

I wound up ending the two year relationship and quitting my job, and started trying to piece myself together. Unfortunately, one of the first people I dated getting back in to the world wasn't honest/upfront with me. It wasn't until a couple months after we stopped seeing each other that she had left me with a lasting 'issue' in the form of HPV. I ask every single partner if they are clean, including her, and she said she was. We used a condom every time but it didn't matter. This made me even more apprehensive to get involved with someone again.

Fast forward a couple years and I finally got myself back to a place where I felt comfortable and confident enough to attempt dating again. I met someone via the apps, we hit it off pretty quickly, she was cute, seemed cool, and I was feeling pretty good after a couple dates. That came to a crashing halt as we got to know each other more and she opened up to me about having trauma identical/worse than my ex, and that she was dating multiple people (I know some people are cool with it, but I am a single lover person). I was crushed, and again pushed back in my shell.

It's been a couple years since then. I am trying to find myself once again, but it is a long, hard journey. I have become pretty comfortable on my own and enjoying the freedom I have. Now that I've told my novel of a backstory.....

I miss having someone. Someone you're close with. Intimate with. Have a connection with. The first person you say good morning to, and the last person you text goodnight. The person who gets you excited when you see you have a new message, and that gives you butterflies when you see its a picture/video/voice message. The person that you joke with, send the stupid but funny thing you see on the internet, brag to. The person you explore and experiment with. The person you want to show off too.

I miss holding someone. I miss being held. I miss having my back scratched and my hair played with as we cuddle on the couch binging a new show. Or an old one. I miss being kissed lightly. I miss groping each other randomly. I miss sex. I miss intimacy. I miss being wanted. And here is where I might lose most people...

I miss having a Mommy.

I know it's not the most desirable kink. Especially since most are looking for a dominant man. Which I can be. I am in most aspects of my life. I like to have control. Which is why I think I enjoy giving up that control.

I was introduced to 'Mommy' play by an older woman when I was in my early 20s. I wasn't too sure at first, but the more I was exposed to, the more I began to enjoy it.

When I was with my ex, we explored more together, and I fell in love with it. Now it is by far my favorite kink, and what makes me feel not only the most sexually, but also comfortable. I love everything about it. I love a strong, confident, gentle, endearing, nurturing Mommy. Someone who knows what they want, but is loving and gentle in her demands. Who wants me to feel pleasure just as much as her. Who wants to take care of me, and feel the love I give back to her. I know it took us a long time to get to the point, but that is what I am looking for. I am looking for a Mommy. I know it's not the easiest connection to find, especially as I get older, but like I said I am hoping this finds the right person at the right time. Someone who likes keeping in contact throughout the day and wants something that lasts more than a night.

I am into a lot, I don't have a ton of hard limits, but in the hopes of finding a compatible partner, some of my kinks are: • Mommy dom/Little boy • Gentle femdom • Breastfeeding • Showing off • ASMR • JOI • Pegging • 'Accidents'

There are plenty more, but I think those give a good idea. If you'd like to know any more, just ask. Like I said, I know this is incredibly tough to find, but I am hoping you are out there Mommy!