He was not your favorite person because of our age difference, so I could never be very public about our relationship. We have struggled a lot. More than what I’ve talked about. But there have been also very happy times. I never told you we did birding stewardship on my days off from work sometimes. Or that the reason I love cats is the interaction I have with his cats, and the way I love them. Or that he helped teach me that animals are a gift from God. Or that we’d share music. Or that he was the first person I let touch me intimately after being afraid of sex for so long. The person who always encouraged me to love and find the person who was my hero. To appreciate the time I have with my family. Maybe one day, I will tell you that I loved that man, even though you never have agreed with our relationship.

But most importantly,

I hope you realize that this relationship has guided me into a place where I know how to love you more.

One day I will tell you that mom, one day.