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I could go months without it crossing my mind, then I am out in public or doing something completely unrelated, and the memories and feelings come back. I admit they aren’t bad; but they occupy my mind and my needs until I allow myself to think about them to completion. Sometimes I have to get away and escape, as a treat, to allow myself to “think” about it, completely exhausting my body and mind until I am satiated.
I have accepted it would always stay with me and be a part of who I am. I just wish the thoughts weren’t so completely overpowering at times.
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