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I just had a chemical pregnancy, this is my third loss this year. I hate talking to medical staff, they treat you like you're so stupid.
Context. After my second MMC my OB told me to message him through the patient portal as soon as I get my next positive test so he can run some labs. I might need progesterone supplements or something. Last week i got a positive test so I wrote him and was written back by one of the staff. she talked to me like I was an idiot and it's as if she didn't even read my messages properly. I explained I've had 2 losses and now got a positive, OB told me to contact them when I get a positive test so here I am, please pass along the message and I'll await his advice.
She responded "we don't need to see you until 8 weeks minimum. We won't even be able to see anything on ultrasound before 6 weeks. He has an opening on x date, do you want to come in at 2 or 2:30 pm." Not what I asked for at all. It's like she didn't even read my message. I accepted the appointment but reiterated (politely) that I wasn't asking to come in I just wanted OB to know so he could order whatever labs he wants. Idk I'm not a fucking doctor.
Well a few days later I started bleeding heavily so I messaged again with the details, that I believe it's a chemical pregnancy and please cancel the appointment. She replied by saying "why do you think it's a chemical. Have you had blood tests."
I explained... Again... I got a positive test and now I'm bleeding heavily. To my limited knowledge it's a chemical. I have an appointment tomorrow with my PCP for labs.
She responded by saying "oh, yes that sounds like a chemical pregnancy. We can see you for blood tests and run some labs if you want". Like really? It took this much back and forth for you to actually hear what I'm saying. I politely responded by saying I've already got an appointment with my PCP so no thanks.
Like, why is it so difficult to get them to hear you? I had to explain multiple times. And this is over messaging so she could just READ what I wrote but she doesn't?? I'm sorry for such a long post. Just so frustrating to be spoken to like I'm dumb.
Wow that's so frustrating. Wtf. Ive honestly had the similar happen with my first miscarriage, the NP came in and congratulated me for my new baby. I was like uhh no I had a miscarriage... it was so weird.
I'm so sorry you've gone through that. It sucks so much that this seems to be a common thing. It's so invalidating to have to explain yourself over and over and they still act like you don't know your own health.
Thank you so much for the support.
Dragons lol. You're right and I'm sorry you've had similar experiences! I do love my OB, so I will definitely bring it up to him.
I know right. When OB told me to message right away I felt better, like I'd be able to get help early and maybe prevent another loss. Her responses just made me feel so defeated.
Thank you for the support
Thank you so much for the support. That is a very good idea. I won't accept communication with this nurse again, definitely a learning experience.
I'm not sure if she's a nurse or a PA or whatever but I will certainly do this. Thanks for the advice
What really? I haven't heard it's anecdotal, that's so weird. Yeah id absolutely get another opinion! I'm sorry that happened to you.
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This is so validating thank you so much. I feel the same way. I thought she was so rude and dismissive. Like did she even bother passing along the message? Didn't sound like it.
I will absolutely bring this up to him. Thanks again.