(Hey, E. Please stop messing with my posts. I'm just trying to meet some cool people, ok?)

I'm totally going to lie and say that this is going to be a really short post, but we both know it will still be annoyingly long in comparison to what "normal short" is. I don't get how you all write these succinct, normal-person posts. But it's 1:15am, and today has really handed my a$$ to me. Do you remember that video of the kid when he's high after the dentist and he goes "is this real life?" That's me most of the time, especially yesterday and today. Ok, let's move on to my sales pitch.

-I'm looking for some friendly peeps who wanna talk and listen to me make sarcastic/stupid jokes.

-I'm sometimes known as Partially Pink Hair Girl on here (pink side bangs)

-I'm a poet; it is my one, true love.

-I believe that if you like listening to Mac Miller, we were destined to meet/message. 

-I've been active on Reddit for 2.5ish months. This place is a trip. Freakin' wild. Being a woman is crazy, but on the internet? I repeat: is this real life?

-Yes, this post is for guys and before you open with "why do you want to talk to guys?" as some clever way to pretend to look into my psyche, it's 'cause you guys are funny and make me laugh and can be quite surprising, etc.

-My age constraints are 25ish-46ish yo, byob (I just wrote that last part and I'm not sure why? I'm gonna just keep it there)

-I love reading, especially smut. That $ht is good. I also own 450 non-smut books. I like reading.

-My favorite movie is She's So Lovely and the trailer for it is horrible, but the movie is great and my favorite part is when she says she just wants to break beer bottles over people's heads. Like, exactly. Yes. I feel this deeply.

You know what would make my day/night/day? If you answered this and when I woke up, I had all these cool people to talk to in the morning. And I might catch some of you right now since I'm still up and chilling. 

I'm honestly much more interesting than I sound in this. Crap. I'm like the worst salesperson ever. Can't even sell myself. Ok wait. That doesn't sound right. Disregard that. I just mean that I sound boring. Go to my profile page and you'll see my "reddit post portfolio." 

Until then, break some beer bottles (preferably over people's heads) and come say hi if you've got good vibes. 

(Told you it wouldn't be short)

26ish-46ish yo