I'm paraphrasing, because I can't find the original snippet, but Ali Abdaal told this story about when he was training to be a doctor and was doing his first shifts in A&E, he wanted to work as fast as possible, skip breaks, etc, hoping to empty up the waiting room, and then he could relax.

Some more experienced doctor apparently said something along the lines of "the waiting room will never be empty."

This is absolutely my personality. I'm a freelancer, and I would MUCH rather work on the weekends, tipping away at my to-do list, so that I can feel marginally more relaxed on Monday morning knowing I've gotten the urgent tasks out of the way. I feel MORE stressed throughout the weekend if I know I've got urgent tasks to get to.

A part of this is a strategy that works, and I don't want to completely eliminate it, but it absolutely seeps into all aspects of my personality. I'm constantly trying to "get ahead" hoping that the Waiting Room will be more empty tomorrow, then I can finally relax, but obviously it never is.

When I heard this analogy it really resonated with me, but how have you combatted this anxious feeling of trying to free up the Waiting Room, once you realised you never will?

How have you been able to actively organise your work & responsibilities in a way that lessens this urging feeling to try and finally check everything off the list?

I've recently started seriously meditating every single day, but I still feel like a lot of times I get distracted thinking about the next thing I need to get done, or I lower the quality of my session because I am not truly present, subconsciously I'm just trying to "check this other thing off the list" so I can move onto more urgent tasks.

I have a healthy lifestyle, hitting a step goal every day, mostly follow a regular sleep cycle, I exercise regularly and eat pretty well. My biggest obstacle is my own anxiety and managing my workload in a way that doesn't make me feel stressed about responsibilities, stressed about work, and stressed about financial security (I live paycheck to paycheck.)

I'd appreciate any actionable advice that's worked for you.