My results from open-heart meditation this morning

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I tried a 16-minute meditation video on YouTube centering around opening and listening to your heart. The result was a back-and-forth of "fuck you" between myself and my heart for what must have lasted for about five minutes. It then unloaded a "the reason you suck" speech at me for the rest of the exercise, along with some empty death threats, and finished with the following:

"I can't keep taking care of you."

I don't know what to do with that. What do you do when the part of you that cares about you is too angry and exhausted to care about you?

And before you say therapy, this is me with therapy.

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Posted: 10 months ago
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