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It's Thanksgiving, you're stuck with family, so you might as well get drunk. As you secretly read through these posts and try to laugh instead of cry... might as well get a few drinks in!
Take a drink for every post that says, "I'm married and not trying to change my situation"
Take a drink every time you read about "being excited to check my phone" or "butterflies"
Take a drink every time you see a F4M post that has more than 5 guys that have replied "I DM'd you"
Take a drink every time you see a F4M post that has more than 5 guys that have replied "I'm just outside your age range"
Take a drink every time someone says "fun and flirty"
Take a drink if you scroll through 15 m4f posts before seeing a f4m post
Take a drink for every M4F post that says "athletic" in it somewhere. Drink twice if when they send a picture it's clear that the only athletic thing they did was getting out of bed
Take a drink for every m4f post where the poster is under 23
Take a drink if a F4M poster refers to herself as "Not everyone's cup of tea"
Take a drink for every F4M post where they talk about politics
Take a shot if the post is an F4M post where the woman is ages 23 to 28 and really interested in sexting
Take a shot every time you see the wrong form of your/you're or there/their/they're
Take a shot every time you see someone talking about ghosting
Take a drink for every misuse of the word "women" when the poster means "woman"
Finally...
Have fun, but try to not get alcohol poisoning! Happy Thanksgiving!
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- 2 months ago
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