Ok, so just to emphasise, this is my (m38) issue!

Been married for 12 years and have a child with diagnosed additional needs. We both work full time, I cook all the time and we share cleaning, I do most of the tidying and we are both always supporting our child (6).

My wife has diagnosed anxiety & depression. We discovered many many years ago that her drive was strongly linked to alcohol (Ie horny when drunk) but that has a negative impact on mental health so we’re both pretty much tea total expect for special occasions. Her medication pretty much kills whatever drive was left.

I’ve always had a pretty high drive, but am erm, nearly content looking after myself as I don’t like being a burden. We have discussed, I’ve asked if there is anything I can do, but she gets upset and just apologises that she isn’t interested (I am honestly as gentle as I can be in this conversation). So we are intimate maybe 2-3 times per year. A new ‘toy’ sometimes offers interest, but the novelty fades really quickly for her.

My issue is, the last year or so, my drive is going through the rough. I don’t know why and it’s often at unhelpful times. What I’m asking is, is this just an age thing and likely to regress to a more manageable level? Or is there any advice you would offer?