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Narc free careers?
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So I’ve been chatting with some of my coworkers and it seems, although they too are currently managed by a narcissist, they appear to have had a narc free past history in their careers.

When I talked about my last boss before this, who was over the top grandiose, I think they are suspicious that someone could act that arrogant, selfish, obnoxious and rude. She was almost like a cartoon character. Something I guess you can’t wrap your head around until you see it. I almost wonder if they think I made it up.

Current boss is not as obvious and more passive aggressive and manipulative. I don’t think either knows she is a narcissist. Both coworkers are easygoing and let things slide.

Is it possible someone can go through their careers without working for one? Do you find people who just think you’re exaggerating or your stories couldn’t possibly be true?

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I was in college for social work as well as worked as a paraprofessional and volunteer in social welfare organizations.

The education and training in social work is so heavily focused on kindness, empathy, meeting people where they're at, understanding trauma and the complex presentations of it, developing social and communication skills geared at fostering connection and openess, and the dire importance of providing therapeutic and meaningful support to individuals, families and communities, that I can't help but feel that most narcissists would be turned right off by it very fast. The only avenue of narcissistic supply would likely be the savior complex, but there's far less demanding and more illustrious pathways to that.

I never met anyone in that field that pinged my narc detector. There were people who had personality and mental health issues, sure. And one social worker who... had a tough love philosophy of sorts, and surprisingly limited perspectives, but struck me as being the right sort of social worker for a particular type of client, and I genuinely thought she was well-meaning in her methods.

It's a whole lot of stressful grunt work, often with people who are broken and living hellish lives, for no recognition or accolades, except perhaps the joy of seeing a client succeed or go on to have a better life after working with you. Why would any narc pursue that?

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10 months ago