I’m already in my 30’s honestly I never had someone in my life. I feel like I will live forever alone. I don’t know I’ve already tried some dating apps but I can’t still get one.

Boys don’t like me because of my looks. And honestly, I want to have kids and a family but it’s just like fate doesn’t want me to have one. I feel jealous of those people who are already married and settled down. My friends already have kids, and some people are annoyed and keep asking me when I’m going to have kids and married. It’s actually pissing me off sometimes and feels offended about it. What can I do no matter what I do, guys don’t like me.

I’m not saying this to feel pity for me. No, I just want to share how I feel because I have no one to talk to. In my whole life, there are times I feel like an outcast, I’m not a bad person, I didn’t kill or hurt someone but in my whole life, and when I was young, I feel like my life is full of bad luck like I was cursed. I grew up without knowing my dad, and only child. It’s like how unfair life is.

I experienced bullying most of the time, but I learned to ignore it and I learned to stand up for myself. Because I don’t want anyone to see me weak. Sometimes solitude is my comfort but I don’t want to be alone forever, I want to feel loved, that I’m important and that I have the right to be loved and a mother. I want to feel it because I’m longing for it. But no one’s giving me a chance.

There’s person that I like who doesn’t like me back, I know there’s nothing we can do about it. But how comes no one is coming to me and appreciating me? I feel like I don’t exist. And I hate that feeling.