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Hello dear. How are you? Are you eating enough? You look skinny. Have you spoken to your mother lately? How's school? Are you making friends? No? Well you came to the right place. According to my driver's license I'm 24, but mentally and emotionally you can tack a good four decades onto that.
If you're looking for a friend who:
- has at least 20 knitted sweaters
- loves to bake cookies
- watches Jeopardy! every night
- keeps all her passwords on post-it notes on the fridge
- is terrified of loud noises
- drinks a shitload of tea
- has a bad back
then you're in luck, sweetie. Cuz I'm going to grannify your life. Come chat with with me while I do jigsaw puzzles. Let's watch a movie together; I'll ask you to explain the plot every five minutes. Be prepared for corrections if you're writing me with bad grammar or punctuation. Most importantly though, if we hit it off, expect plenty of filthy jokes at inappropriate times. I may be a grandma at heart, but I'm not dead yet.
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- 1 year ago
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- reddit.com/r/MakeNewFrie...