Sir Fresh: “Hello fellow ordinary New Zealanders! Today I’ll be taking written questions from supporters of parties other than National. Now, events like these usually use undecided voters to represent ‘middle New Zealand’ and the average voter. But for an esteemed statesman and two term Prime Minister such as myself, that’s too easy. Instead, I’ll have hardball questions thrown at me by voters who have made a conscious decision not to vote for the National Party. The point of this exercise, other than the value in civil debate, is to give National’s position on whatever criticism we face from parties with different views to us. I hope that I’ll convince a number of those watching to vote for the National Party, and maybe some of the people asking questions too. But if not, I’ve at least got my word in. Alright, first question - from a supporter of the recently formed Kiwi Party.”

Sir Fresh reads out the question from the Kiwi Party supporter: “Hello Sir Fresh. I live in the Aoraki electorate (I won’t disclose where for fear of liberals learning of my location) and I have heard from TheOWOTrongle that National, and all other parties, have neglected the regions. What is National doing to help out rural communities in New Zealand?”

Sir Fresh: “Well, the simple answer is that we’re planning on doing a lot. In the previous budget the Minister of Culture Mattsthetic included funding for the Regional Culture and Heritage Fund, which will not only stimulate rural economies but ensure that recreational facilities are available outside of the big cities. National is also responsible for the creation of the Regional Investment Corporation, which over successive governments has invested billions into rural communities for the purpose of improving infrastructure and providing low interest loans to regional entrepreneurs. In government we’d allocate even more money for the RIC. National is also keenly aware of how job prospects in rural communities are limited and often hard to learn of - that’s why we would establish a regional job shadowing programme to connect teenagers with jobs right out of high school.

“We’ll also work with farmers and our agricultural sector, rather than against them, in one way by liberalising New Zealand’s animal welfare regulations to reduce the burden on farmers. National will end government land-banking by partially privatising Landcorp - an incredibly unprofitable state owned enterprise - and allow Kiwi farmers to try and turn a profit on the land themselves. National will ensure the long-term security of our agricultural industry by updating the Biosecurity Act to include new types of diseases and pests, and we will invest in primary sector marketing and research efforts to spread awareness and improve efficiency. We will also support water capture and irrigation projects to increase agricultural productivity, reduce risk and even flush away environmentally-harmful algae. Finally, National realises that the oil and mineral wealth that New Zealand has is worth utilising, and can bring serious growth for our often stagnant regions. We’d repeal the first half of the Environmental Protection Act which effectively bans resource extraction on one third of New Zealand’s entire landmass. That’s right, one third. Instead we would leave it up to the government to allow whether projects continue using, among other things, a rigorous cost-benefit analysis. Hope that answers your question. Now, a question from a… Green supporter.”

Sir Fresh reads out the question from the Green supporter: “Climate change is the biggest threat to the security of New Zealand, and the world. Sir Fresh - does National recognise this, and what do you plan to do about it if elected to govern?”

Sir Fresh: “We absolutely do recognise the threat posed by climate change, and I agree with you entirely. Like all of our policy, National’s approach to climate change is evidence based and seeks to implement level-headed and reasonable solutions which reduce emissions without throwing the baby out with the bathwater. I admire the Green Party’s tenacity and concern for an issue as big as this one, but the fact is that not all solutions proposed to reduce emissions are good ones. Another fact is that New Zealand can only do so much by itself - ultimately the vast majority of carbon emissions aren’t produced by us. I personally believe that New Zealand’s role should be to utilise our clean-green image by setting a fair example for the world to follow, and to use our influence to support international agreements to reduce emissions. We shouldn’t sacrifice our economic prosperity by implementing ineffectual measures like gas and oil bans when they will do nothing alone. With all that being said, National pledges to raise the carbon tax by $10 a tonne if elected to ensure that we meet our emissions standards, and we will have at least half of all public sector vehicles be hybrid or electric. National will also do what the Greens neglected to in government - raise our gas pollutant standards to World Health Organization standards.”

Sir Fresh reads a question from a Labour Party supporter: “Sir Fresh, what will National do to advance Māori interests and will you pledge to support the Māori electoral register?”

Sir Fresh: “Great question. I am acutely aware of the many injustices suffered by the Māori people over New Zealand’s long history and National is committed to solving the socioeconomic inequalities which resulted from that. As I’m sure you know, National has been the party of successful treaty negotiations with nearly 50 Māori groups finalising a Deed of Settlement relating to Treaty of Waitangi claims during the Key Government, compared to just 11 under the previous Labour government. If elected again National would grant more funding to the Office of Treaty Settlements so that Māori communities can have access to justice sooner rather than later. On the topic of socioeconomic injustice, National recognises that Māori health outcomes are often worse than those of Pākehā so we would pledge more funding for Whānau Ora if elected. Additionally, we would establish a micro-financing scheme administered by Te Puni Kōkiri to create a viable alternative to predatory or illegal lenders. Not only would this mean that Māori families can have more money in their hands when they need it, but financial literacy would be improved. As for the Māori electoral register, I think that Māori representation in Parliament is especially important so as to ensure that a voice is there to speak for Māori interests no matter what.”