I love buying clothes! In fact, much of my free time is spent browsing the Fashion Nova, Torrid and Amazon sites looking at new outfits. Usually, my browsing leads to an internal argument within myself:

Oooo! Look at that cute skirt! But do I really need another skirt I won't be wearing out anytime soon? Those shoes! Gorgeous! I better hold off, though, until I master walking in five-inch heels...

Probably the most frustrating part of clothes shopping for me, is determining my size in women's clothing.

Clothing manufacturers make certain presumptions when they produce clothing for the masses. They base their men's styles on cis men having a trapezoid body shape--wider at the shoulder than at the waist. Just looking around at our overweight society should tell you that isn't necessarily always true. But clothiers have to determine a workable model and cis men have to try to find something that fits.

Same goes for cis women. The manufacturers assume they are leaner than cis men, and have more of an hourglass body shape--narrower at the waist than at the bust and hips. Again, this is a gross generalization and cis women struggle to find flattering fits.

None of their sizing issues, though, compare to the obstacles facing trans women trying to find feminine styles to fit.

This is one point on which I believe trans men have it easier than us trans women. Generally, they have smaller frames to begin with and can find small-sized cis men's clothing to wear without too much trouble. The opposite it true, however, when a larger-sized trans woman is looking for cis women's fashions that will look good on them. From my experience, it often is like trying to fit a blocky square peg into a smaller round hole.

Before buying anything, take your measurements! That means across your chest, at the waist, and around your hips. You'll need to take even more measurements if you are buying a bra or corset, as you'll need under-boob measurements, and for some shirts and tops, arm length as well.

I'm embarrassed to admit to all the money I've wasted on ill-fitting clothing. Especially in the early days of my transition, when I was blindly guessing at my sizes based on the sketchy "size guides" that usually accompany clothing ads online. Buying at a brick-and-mortar store where you can try on clothing is best, without a doubt.

There is a Torrid outlet in the local mall and I got the nerve up to go shopping there alone. Simply by eyeballing the merchandise, I came up with their size 2 as a good place to start. And it fit! Ever since then, I feel comfortable buying from them online.

Living in southeast Michigan, we are fortunate to have Janet's Closet nearby. If you are familiar with it, Janet's is a well-established crossdresser/transgender clothing store located downriver in Wyandotte. And it is a Mecca for any trans woman looking to try on clothing in comfort and without scrutiny.

At Janet's, the sales staff (mostly young women as far as I can determine) is universally sweet and very helpful. They will help you with finding appropriate styles, fitting you, and even providing makeovers. A service which I indulged in one day and heartily recommend.

I came out of my first visit to Janet's with a new corset and bra, neither of which I would have bought online without trepidation. I also picked up the human-hair wig that I wear to this day.

But not everyone has the luxury of having a Janet's near them. So, they are limited in their options and that usually means shopping online. At this point, I have to say "Thank God for the internet!" But just as quickly I have to follow that with, "I sooooo hate the internet!"

News flash: Every site and store online seems to have their own system of assigning sizes.

This is something you probably already knew. You've been buying clothes all your life. But cis people have the huge advantage of having clothing industry standards for much of what they purchase. A size 10 at J.C. Penney is pretty much comparable to a size 10 at Macy's. Not so at online sites that either sell or are located in foreign countries.

Often, size guides on those foreign sites use the metric system. I'm so tired of Googling "centimeters-to-inches," but it's a necessary evil. Even with your dimensions in hand, you're taking a shot in the dark. The numbers provided in ads are different from the actual sizes in real life. My experience is that European and Asian-manufactured clothing runs smaller than American-made. Especially the Asian clothes, which invariably are a tighter fit for my thick frame.

So, what to do? My first suggestion if to find sites and stores that provide consistent sizing options. A chain such as Torrid is one of the best based upon my personal experience and that of other trans women I know. They feature clothing that runs from women's 10 to 30.

Fashion Nova is a "fast fashion" site, and their styles are fashion-forward and geared toward younger clientele. That said, even though most of their clothing is foreign-made, I find many of them fit me well. The only caveat I have is to to size up when purchasing tops and shirts. While I use bust measurements for determining my size, my shoulders are too broad, so I generally go one size above the size suggested by their size guide. Actually, that is a good rule of thumb for any site that sells foreign-made clothing.

Shoes are another issue. It is virtually impossible to find a women's shoe outlet that sells shoes in sizes larger than a women's 12. That is the top size sold in-store at Torrid, for example, although I was able to buy a size 13 off their online site.

Happy to say, some shoe companies have popped up that offer larger sizes that fit trans women. One of the best-known is Pleaser. Their sexy styles are generally worn by strippers and pole dancers, but they come in larger sizes and their use by drag queens has introduced them to the trans community. I bought a pair of cute kitten heels from Pleaser and I love them! Many different stores carry the brand, including Janet's Closet if you live in the Detroit area and want to try them on.

I've only scratched the surface of this subject and I'll stop here. However, below are some links that may help you determine your correct sizing in women's clothing and other tips. Note that there are variations in their numbers, but that is just a reality that you must face.

Transgender Pulse: https://www.transgenderpulse.com/clothing-size-charts/

Stand With Trans: https://standwithtrans.org/trans-lifeline-library-gender-affirming-shopping-general-shopping-tips-size-conversion-measuring-tips-article/

The Cornbury Society: https://www.cornbury.org/sizing-feminine-attire-to-the-male-body/

TransVitae: https://www.transvitae.com/navigating-womens-clothing-sizes-as-a-transgender-woman/

Trans Closet of the Hudson Valley: https://www.transclosethv.org/buying-guide

TransMeDown: https://trans-me-downs.com/blog/article/measuring

Happy shopping!

--- Anni