GEXIII [Kent] troe2339 launches campaign

It’s a rainy and quite windy day in Dover when the Duke of Atholl, troe2339, steps unto the stage at a medium-sized venue in Dover.

“Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. Let us start with a song. If you would all be so kind as to look on page two in the programme.”

A single guitarist who was already sitting on stage strings the tune and the attendants as wells as the candidate, troe2339, start singing the Red Flag the singing ends and there is a short applause for the guitarist as he leaves the stage.

“Thank you, Jimmy. Let’s give another round of applause for one of our local Labour Party members who volunteered to play for us today.”

There is another round of applause for Jimmy.

“Don’t fret, he’ll be back again soon to play while we enjoy some food, so I will try to make my statement as short as possible.

“Friends, workers, ladies and gentlemen and everyone else… I am running to be your member of Parliament here in Kent!

“Some of you may know me from my time in earlier cabinets. I may have been out of the public eye for a bit now while I’ve been slumping away in the House of Peers, having tried to sway that House in a less conservative direction, but I am back now to represent the People in the House of Commons. I wish to represent the People where their voice matters and where we can bring true change to this country. I therefore ask you to vote for me and for the Labour Party in the upcoming election. A vote for Labour is a vote for the People and the workers!”

The crowd applauds and there are a few who shout encouraging remarks.

“We have seen enough abhorrent conservative and capitalist legislation, a prime example of which is the latest ‘People’s’ budget. What a sham! Pretending like the Tory and LPUK government cares about the common people of this country. What they care about is the profit of the shareholders of major companies and the paychecks and taxes of CEOs of these companies. They have never given more than half a thought for the common person in this country. 

“One such example is their cutting of housing benefits in this sham budget. A home is a basic need of any human. Without it, we cannot feel truly safe. Even Maslow realised this. If this government is re-elected we’re saying ‘it’s okay not to care if the hard-working people of this country cannot afford a home to live in’. That is not a message I wish to send. My party and I promise we will do better than that. We promise to do our best to represent the common people of Britain and to do what is best for everyone!”

Applause

“With those words, I launch my campaign for a better Kent and a better Britain. Now I’ve talked long enough, let’s eat and have some fun!”

The crowd gives one last last applause for troe2339 before he steps down to talk to some of the constituents in the hall. Food is brought out for a small buffet with sausages, sandwiches etc. and after a few minutes Jimmy re-enters the stage to play some background music.