Third-Wheel Drama in the Lifestyle

So, I recently had a falling out with a couple I’d been seeing as a third in the lifestyle. They invited me to visit, and things got heated—like really heated.

The husband started showing signs of jealousy and insecurity, which boiled over during a sit-down conversation. He accused me of being “too close” with his wife, even though everything we’d done was agreed upon and planned out ahead of time. At one point, he even snapped at her, calling her names, which left her in tears. Naturally, I tried to make sure she was okay, but that only made things worse. He lashed out, saying, “You’ve got another guy consoling you now?”

The tension had been brewing for a while. I noticed the husband would make passive-aggressive comments, like accusing me of texting other people or claiming his wife wasn’t giving him the same energy she gave me. To top it off, I found out he was secretly recording conversations in the house, which felt like a huge violation of trust.

What really gets me is that we had an agreement to keep things exclusive while we figured out how this dynamic worked. But now, after all the drama, he’s suddenly updating their profile looking for other singles—when he already had the perfect situation in place. It’s like he sabotaged what we had just to go back to square one.

Things hit a breaking point when he messaged the group chat, saying there was to be “no more communication” between his wife and me. This came after I’d heard them arguing late at night, with him storming in and out, and her sleeping in another room.

What really threw me off was that after all this, they unfollowed me on most social media platforms—but weirdly kept me on Facebook. It feels like mixed signals, but I’ve been staying silent and not engaging in any drama.

The whole situation feels like a mess. It’s hard not to take it personally, but I also know their issues aren’t my fault. I’m just trying to figure out the best way to move on from this without adding to the chaos.