Just searched this sub for posts about sub drop and aftercare, because I used to be pretty active here when I was working from home & could SWEAR this was a topic we discussed pretty extensively. Could not find anything, but if there is a post I should read please drop the link in the comments!

So anyhoo… My partner and I have been together since June 2019, started exploring the LS together in February 2020, a month later COVID shut it down. So we’ve been trying to find another couple we want to play with for almost two years. Have met a few couples we liked, but none ever worked out for various reasons.

Finally met a couple we REALLY like, played together after our 2nd date and it was fun but the aftermath was rough for me.

Felt fat and unattractive and undesirable and told my partner I need to pull back from any further naked play with them until I figured it out. My partner was absolutely supportive, without any questions or concerns. And we had some wonderful conversations - just the two of us as well as with the other couple in our group chat. They were all totally cool with no more sexy time until I feel good about it, and we all wanted to continue to meet up and develop a vanilla friendship even if we cannot be FWB.

Fast Forward 2 weeks - today I shared my experience with a female LS friend and she immediately said “It sounds like you experienced Sub Drop. You need to talk about your feelings with your partner before and after you play and you need some aftercare. It’s so important that you talk about how you feel with him and allow yourself to be okay with whatever you are feeling.”

Happy to provide more details if needed or wanted, but rn my questions are…

1- Anyone else ever experience this and what, if anything, helped you?

2- What has your most helpful aftercare looked/felt like?

TIA