I’m in my twenties and whenever I socialize lately I always feel like shit afterward. Either I feel like I was being annoying, or people were annoying me, or I feel like I embarassed myself, or it wasn’t that fun, or I just get an indescribable lonely sadness.

Lately all I want to do is abandon everything and move up north into the mountains. Live in a small town in a cute cottage in Vermont or Maine or maybe Washington or Oregon. Have my books. Work on the house and have a garden. Draw, and write. Go to the local bookstore and just live in peace. Befriend the forest critters and get a dog and a cat. And a pig. Go on hikes. Forage in the forest and mountains and rivers. You get my drift.

How would I even do this though? Everything is so expensive. I have a good job right now and I have a chemistry degree but there aren’t many jobs for that up there. I have a lot of savings as well. Plus I would have to learn carpentry for the house.