Okay lesbians here is the deal. I met a woman on Tinder and we connected instantly and started talking all day every day for 10 days. I said I love you after a week 😂🤣🤷🏻‍♀️. I would get so wet when talking to her.

Here’s are the issues. I was in a relationship with another woman for five years but it’s the only other woman that I’ve been with and whenever I fantasise it’s usually about men or het sex. So this woman and I met for first day and there was immediate chemistry. In fact I kissed her in the car, we had a long drive and there was definitely touching. It was hot.

When we got to the Airbnb, I will be honest I was in and out. And what I mean by that is there were moments where I felt insecure, for example I paid for the Airbnb because she is going through a rough time right now and I didn’t want her to feel insecure about that. And then there were other moments like where she was leading me to the bedroom where I was like “holy shit I’m being led to the bedroom by this woman“ and that also took me out of it. With my ex I was the bigger person and I was also more of the dominant person I did most of the fucking in my previous relationship. Now the script is flipped. This woman is definitely a top.

So it’s become really clear to me that this woman is dominant, very masculine, and also an empath. Every time I left the moment, every time I had a worry or a thought flicker across my face she felt it and she pretty much lost her arousal.

We had okay sex. But it wasn’t mind blowing sex like we had expected from our conversations and our sexting. I wasn’t wet the whole time and that affected things. Also I’ve since the date learned that she has a big clit that usually gets erect which is how she finishes, but the whole time it didn’t get erect and that took her out. It was absolutely different for me to be on the bottom and not be in charge. It was different for me to be engulfed by somebody who is taller than me and stronger than me. It was good but different. I have such strong feelings for this woman, like I really could see myself living the rest of my life for her, but so there were some moments where I was overwhelmed by the fear and realisation of what was happening in my life on a deeper level, like is this it is this the person that I’m with for the rest of my life I found her? That sometimes makes you lose your arousal, you know?

After we met up and then parted ways, she text me and she said she was worried about our sexual chemistry. We had a conversation and we’ve both been very very honest with each other and we will continue to do that but I was wondering if anyone has any advice? Is there a way that two tops can be together? What can I do to like get in the mindset for this end is it normal for two women to sort of lose that sexual drive in the middle of sex is it something that you keep having to restart like an engine?

I’m not that experienced with women. I’ve only been with one other woman and our sex life was really tame to be honest. We definitely, me and my ex, spent way more time cuddling than having sex. I think of the woman that I’m with now is used to full on fucking her partners into oblivion. And I am into it but I’m going to have to ramp up my drive.

I think part of the problem also is that I because I was raised superconservative I’m getting used to the idea of like a womanly woman’s body. My ex was very boyish and flat. And it’s just taking me time to get used to this. I will take any and all advice on this subject thank you very much and I will answer any questions you have nothing is too personal. I also think my new partner might be intersex? The way she explains how big her clit actually is sounds like that. But I don’t know 🤷🏻‍♀️