me and my gf r were fight about something ridiculous (tiktok) and now she doesn't really want to talk to me

I don't have anything to distract me from thinking about her. I have no friends or noone to talk to.

I feel so pathetic because it's hard for me to make connections with people and I don't really have desire to make friends but at the same time I do.

i don't feel like I fit in with her or her friends.. and she even made me feel like that even more bc she said she doesn't see me as a real nigerian 💀

I know it's not that srs but I don't even fit in with my own people 😭

or when I told her that I was a lesbian she said that I'll change my mind one day. she would say this everytime I mentioned it

I find it weird ngl

this feeling of not belonging is really painful. I could be having a good time with 5 people and I still wouldn't feel like I belong.

I was thinking about the beginning of our relationship and there was so much love bombing

I've always told myself that I'm immune to it but apparently not😀

bc of this thing I can't not talk to her. I always want to be with her 24/7 even when I'm home I try not to cry bc she's not with me

I even started to notice when she slowly stopped. instead of typing "I love you (so much)🩷🩷🩷" she's now typing "love you" with no emojies😭😭😭 and her typing style isn't the same as before 😭😭 and the way she behaves at school too

maybe I'm just overreacting

if I wasn't this vulnerable I wonder if we would even be in this relationship

if I wasn't craving attention and someone to be with I would have broken up our relationships

we fight about the most dumbest things once a week. but ngl I do some things aswell like for example I blocked her on tiktok

I just want a healthy relationship someone that respects boundaries and respects me as well.

and someone that reassure me that they love me

I'll just have to stay here cuz I don't want to go back to my lonely life