So it’s finally happened, a bad trip after 30 solid trips. I thought I knew the substance well enough and had enough experience but it put me in my place.

I’ve taken up to 5 paper tabs before and 4 gels, I think the highest dose I’ve taken was probably closer to 500ug which was a bit tough but I handled it well. This time it was 3 gel tabs (which I had taken a week before so I didn’t except to lose my shit).

Had a free day, no trouble or worries. I was at my girlfriend’s place (she doesn’t trip) and thought it would be like any other time. I took 3 gel tabs and a little bit of some uneven edges that I cut off. So in total I would say 3.25 tabs, nothing too crazy.

2:00pm - dropped the tabs and sat down to relax

2:30 - anxiety coming over me which is typical so I just relax and try to ride it out.

2:40 - I notice more and more anxiety but I’m trying not to worry because I know it passes.

2:50 - I can barely walk, I look in the mirror and everything is morphing in and out, I can barely recognize myself. I’m starting to worry a little more now because I’ve never felt the experience being this strong so quick but I still try to stay calm and remind myself of the techniques to stay calm.

3:00 - I’m engulfed with anxiety, I feel incredibly uneasy. I can barely walk, tremors going through my entire body. I pick up my phone and start texting my friend to see if he can come by, he’s incredibly experienced and just having him nearby would ease my mind. He tells me he’s nowhere near me and can’t come by. He tells me the gel tabs are hitting quick because that’s what they’re meant to do. He tells me Its all in my mind and it’s a psychedelic experience that I’m going through and nothing is physically wrong with me. He recommends getting under and AC, and cold water to drink. This helps me a bit but I just sit down with my head down because that’s the only thing that feels right.

3:30 - nothing is getting better and I’m so uneasy now that I feel myself losing my mind. I feel at any moment I will start spazzing out because I can’t get out of this feeling. I was getting scarred I’m going to destroy my gfs house. I’m also scared because I can see the fear and uncertainty on her face even though she was doing amazing keeping it together.

4:00 - she’s rubbing my back slowly and gently, she turned on the shower and is taking care of me. During this time I took 2 lorezapams in hopes it would calm the trip.

4:00 - 4:30 - my head is down, there is calming music playing, my gf is still sliding her fingers on my back. Tremors are shaking up my entire body. I feel so fucking high, I close my eyes and I see VIVID imagery of what seems like 500 A.D. I’m Muslim and it felt like I was seeing images of dessert cities in Saudi Arabia from thousands of years ago. During this time I also felt like I was losing consciousness. It would feel like I was nonexistent for about 30 seconds, somewhere nothing existed, then I would come back to reality. I’d look around, make myself somewhat comfortable again, then go out consciousness again.

5:00 - during this time I’m still very well losing my mind but I’ve learned how to sit and what to listen to to stay calm. I know as time passes the trip will get weaker, as time passes the lorezapam will do more of its job.

5:15 - I get into the shower. Felt horrible. Felt depressed and trapped like an animal in a cage. Got out of there quickly and back to my seat.

5:30 - 6:30 - my GF is playing green pastures (bible verse song). Oh my god this super calming and peaceful. I had my eyes closed and she was still rubbing my back. I felt like I was being sent to another dimension. It felt like my girlfriend’s hands were Jesus’ hands patting me and telling me it’s going to be alright.

During this time my mind was also having an internal conflict because I’m Muslim and she’s Christian. I felt like she’s trying to make me listen to something Christianity related on purpose but that’s just my ego, and I knew she was playing it to help me calm down.

I made myself ignore the thought and get back into being lost in the music. Now that my ego was out of the way, the song got even more beautiful. Now it felt like Jesus and Mohammed were both trying to make me feel better. Telling me to put my belief in god and everything will be alright.

I understood this was a wake up call from god. God was showing me how quickly things can change, and how quickly everything I thought I knew about LSD could go down the drain. I was getting too comfortable with the substance. Forgot what it could really do.

From 6:30 till like 9:30 we went outside and walked and the experience got much better. It felt like I had taken 1-2 tabs and I was feeling the experience I wanted 4-5 hours after consumption. For the rest of the night I avoided talking about the experience because it just scared me.

The days after I feel much better, it was a real wake up call and I’ve never felt better being sober. I feel incredible and clear headed, I don’t feel the need to take LSD again anytime soon. Even when I decide to take it I will take a lower dose.

Shoutout to my GF who was the real MVP. She comforted me and stayed by my side the entire time. Ready to give me exactly what I needed and made sure I was good the whole time. My love and trust for her have sky rocketed since then.

Interested in hearing what you guys think happened and what went wrong. What could I have done differently or better?