Nobody loves me or wants me.
I know people find me cool or interesting, entertaining,.. whatever. But apparently not to want. Not to have.
I'm just a novelty in people's lives. There and gone. A flash of a memory. 'Oh yeah, that happened'. It's so easy for people to just drop someone. What makes people stay? What makes them put in the effort for the long run? They want to be desired, worshiped, fought for. But noone wants to do those things for me.
I give everything and am left with nothing everytime.
I'm tired. I'm weary. I'm gun shy. And I'm not sure anymore that I'll ever be able to let go an give myself fully. I'm emotionally damaged. And see nothing but loneliness and sadness in my future. And I mourn the possibility of future love.