Overwhelmed by everything

I think I'm not made to be a human, as in a human who's in relation with other ppl. I can't be in a relationship, being it family, a partner or a friend. How ppl do this, I feel like it's too hard. I always mess up, and well, I feel like I'm just tired of living in this situation and this life. And yeah sometimes I do feel like maybe me not being here is more helpful for others, but well, if I was gonna do that I should have done it sooner and it's not cost-benefit, my logic. I don't wanna get into details in my post, I can't handle that, but, reddit has always been my last resort. Or only, not sure. Maybe it's some kind of Journaling