This post has been de-listed
It is no longer included in search results and normal feeds (front page, hot posts, subreddit posts, etc). It remains visible only via the author's post history.
ashamed.. I wish I wasn’t so kinky and my fantasies were more tame
I wish I didn’t have such intense desires
I wish I could feel “like myself” without having to be sexual
Why do I have the most hardcore interests known to man? Why do I have to be drawn to taboo, even violent, experiences?
At the same time, I’m now at a place where I’m longing for a relationship. I feel like these 2 sides of myself are at odds.
I’m ashamed that I’m ashamed. The last guy I tried to date told me he was intimidated by my sexuality. After him I tried to have a casual hook up and that guy said, “I can’t do this, I’m starting to have feelings.” He said he doesn’t see me as a plaything.
So now what? The guys I’m emotionally into are intimidated by my desires. The guys I just wanna fuck think my heart is “too big” and I “deserve better.”
I really really wish I didn’t have this massive yearning to be used and feel desperate.
When I am submissive and engaged is masochist activities, I feel like myself. I feel alive and aligned. But I don’t want to play with just anyone.
I love my kinky side and sometimes I wish I didn’t have her.
Subreddit
Post Details
- Posted
- 1 month ago
- Reddit URL
- View post on reddit.com
- External URL
- reddit.com/r/KINK/commen...