TW: Domestic Violence

I've posted here once before over a year ago about my JNFIL and I not having a good relationship. Last night it finally escalated into physical violence.

He lives in our backyard still but we mostly had a silent understanding that we would avoid each other as much as possible to keep the peace and spare my wife any hardship. I'd do my best to keep up with household chores and work and he pays for our groceries in lieu of rent or anything else since he hasn't been working on our property like he originally said he was going to do to earn his keep around here.

What pushed him over the edge last night was that two nights ago he bought dinner for all of us. I went and picked it up but did not take his food out to him right away. My reasoning for this was because A) I genuinely thought he was going to come into the house and get it and B) I was on the phone and messenger with my wife trying to find out if she was going to be stuck in Seattle over night in the middle of the riots because the curfew was blocking her path to the ferry terminal so I was feeling rather anxious and distracted by that.

Last night he came in fuming about his food not being delivered to him while it was still hot. I tried to explain to him the reasoning for why that happened and sincerely apologized for the confusion at which point he reached out and put me in a choke hold. I fought back and he wrestled me to the ground continuing to attempt to choke me out before my wife came downstairs and broke us up.

My neck is fine (some light bruising and soreness but it'll heal). Talked to my wife and told her that I'm willing to let this go this time but if anything remotely like it happens again (even just a threatening voice), cops will be called on him. She said that was fine and would back me up if I ever felt that I needed to do that.

12 hours later I'm anxious and shaken up (already had to take my emergency anxiety medicine) and finding it hard to concentrate on work today. I've already informed my closest friends of what happened and they all agree that I'm being too lenient and should have called the cops right away.

Anyways, mostly needed to just get this off my chest. Any TLC and support I can get to help keep my mind off things would be lovely.