Ok, so as most of you with JNMILs know… information diets, low contact, etc is extremely important! Well… I decided to wish her a happy birthday by text. I kept it simple and straightforward. Just Happy Birthday MIL! We love you ❤️ with a pic of LO (huge mistake). I knew this. But I wanted to put in some effort, and now I’ve learned that next time? No effort whatsoever, no pictures of LO, no “I hope you have the best day” nothing like that. Or she’ll just say, “it would be better if you let me see LO”.

Anyway. DH, LO and I dropped off her gift tonight, took time out of LO’s bedtime routine and had a late dinner just to bring her gift. We knew she wasn’t home, but her birthday party is on the weekend. DH wanted her to have her gift on her actual birthday.

She texted ME, and said “thanks for the gift. I love it but I wish you came on a night I was home so I could see LO. You knew I wouldn’t be home.”

The fuck?? Clearly I ignored that shit. Now, I feel like I need to deal with this by texting a diplomatic, level headed response to put her in her place. Because DH doesn’t realize there’s an issue. He is enmeshed with emotional manipulation and doesn’t even know what passive aggressive means.

I really rather just ignore it, and not go on the weekend as her consequence.

Can’t she even just be damn thankful we remembered her stupid birthday and took time out of our busy fulfilled lives to bring her gift? Nope! She’s a JNMIL, and emotional manipulation is what JNMILs do best!

But I would like to reply to make her feel stupid and put her in her place.

Edit: Update: I have a major SO problem. He’s hardcore taking his mom’s side. He says I was rubbing it in MIL’s face that we went there to drop off her gift when she wasn’t home. Now I’m shaking. I want a divorce. I am livid. He also wants to start bringing LO over to MIL’s house every weekend.