Hello all, if anyone remembers me, I'm the DIL whose MIL thought it was appropriate for her, my FIL, and my GMIL to unexpectedly show up to where I was getting ready before my wedding and excuse it as "it's tradition for the MIL to get ready with the bride" *see post history.

After our reception and her giving us her *lovely wedding card, I officially dropped the rope and went NC with his whole family. I had told DH that I would not participate in any family events without a discussion with his parents of what had happened at our wedding and to at least clear the air. He has been over to his parents' house a couple times since to visit FIL and to gauge whether a discussion is worth while, MIL basically stays present but doesn't engage with DH and FIL acts like nothing is wrong.

Thanksgiving we spent with my family, me and my mom cooked most of the day and had a great time bonding. I can't believe for the past 3 years I've been prioritizing his family during the holidays to be a good DIL while putting my family on the back burner. No more from this point on, I've told DH that I will only spend holidays with people that love and care about the both of us and he agrees. On Thanksgiving, MIL sent DH a love bomb text that said "I hope you eat a lot of turkey today, I love and miss you" *gag. FIL texted me Happy Thanksgiving, again acting like everything is fine.

In years past, I've always coordinated with DH about Xmas gifts to his family. I love DH to death, but he's a procrastinator and I would be the one with the ideas for gifts and pushing him to not wait to the last minute to go shopping. This year, I made it clear to DH I would not involve myself in any Xmas gift giving and he is completely fine with this. I decided that the money I had put aside for his family's gifts is going towards a HUGE gift to DH because he deserves it for everything he's been thru.

Yesterday he went over to his parents' to visit FIL, I had asked what was their plan for Xmas and he said he was going to go over there for a few minutes Xmas Eve then leave (my family also does Xmas eve gift giving so I'll be with them). After discussing more, DH said MIL is still digging her heels in not taking any responsibility in her part of what happened and still blames me for everything (surprise). Which means I'm still not welcome in his parents' home and not included in their Xmas eve gathering (fine by me). DH's extended family is having their get together Xmas day which DH said we both are going to go together to at least see his grandmother for awhile then we'll leave (I love his gma and have made her a blanket for Xmas).

To add to this chaos, we just found out we're pregnant with our first child (YAY!). This is a first grandchild for both of our parents, so it's a big deal. We have yet to tell anyone since it's still so early in my pregnancy (shhh). I explained to DH that I'm fine with the arrangements for this Xmas but next year I refuse to spend holidays separately once LO is here, no ifs, ands, or buts about it, which he agrees. DH has said that MIL is being childish and petty about excluding me for Xmas and that she was told this will affect holidays in the future going forward and she is still sticking to her guns (DH is only going to their house Xmas eve to spend time with FIL).

I made it clear, this is the hill that I will die on. I refuse to entertain someone else's feelings who doesn't respect me or my relationship with DH. And boy, will she have a rude awakening when LO arrives. She's dreamed of us giving her grandbabies for years and her being the go-to person to babysit. Well, not only will she not be included in anything baby related but she will not have any access to LO as long as I'm alive. If she doesn't respect me as DH's wife, you can sure bet she would not respect me as LO's mother.