I know this lady, but she's someone I only just saw in person again recently (last time was 10 years ago), when she earned her JNMIL status.

Backstory: One of my cousins travels around the world for his work, doing on-site work for months (usually 2 months to 2 years) at a time. He always rents an old van with his car money and he always lives in a less trendy area of a town that he's staying in, so that he can rent a bigger place, allowing friends and family (including his wife & their 2 kids) to easily stay with him.

I usually don't go visit when my family goes, because paid time off is too precious a commodity to spend on long visits to/with my family.

But one time I did. I had just broken up with a shitty BF, and a little travel seemed like a good idea. That particular time, the following people went: me, my mom, my dad, aunt 1, aunt 2, aunt 3, and aunt 3's friend, who I will call Interference. Aunt 3 is my cousin's mom. Interference is a close work friend of hers (they've worked together for decades). Interference was coming because her son happens to live in the same down, so she was going to visit/stay with him, and we'd all do stuff together (including him).

Her son had finished up a really nasty divorce a few months earlier. He was about 5 years older than me. My family starts making jokes about how great it would be if we got together. Because it'd be totally awesome to start a LDR with my aunt's friend's son? I dunno...

Anyhow, we all go out a few times, and he seems like a nice enough guy, putting up with all the ridiculous BS my family keeps pulling (like sneak-attack trying to put lip gloss on me so I'm more attractive. Or something. They're insane). I wasn't crazy attracted to him, but if he were local to me, he was definitely someone I'd go on a few dates with.

We exchange phone numbers, and after everybody leaves his town, he and I start texting and calling each other regularly. After a month or so, he invites me on a trip to Cancun (Caaaaancuuuuuuuuuuuuuun!). It's with a few of his other friends, including some female ones, so I can stay in a room with his female friends. We go as friends, see if anything develops, but we can just be friendly. I accept. I've never been to Cancun (Caaaaaaancuuuuuuuuuuuun!), so I think this will be fun. Trip is set to happen in 3 months.

I end up not going on the trip, because I meet a guy in my city between then and trip time, so I don't go.

I then hear through the familial grapevine that he was SUPER bummed I didn't go. Apparently, he'd been REALLY into me. I'd honestly had no idea, but whatever.

He invites another woman on the trip. The trip is set for something like a month after Christmas. I went home that year, and saw Interference at Aunt 3's Christmas party. She is just gutted that I'm not going, and predicts that I'm going to be "the one that got away" to him. I laugh it off, but she's like, seriously acting like she's in mourning, which is weird.

Anyways, next thing I hear through the family grapevine is a few months later - the woman he took on the trip got pregnant by accident. They're getting married to have the baby. I hear from Aunt 3 how upset his Interference is, and how if I'd have just gone on this trip, then I'd be the pregnant one, and that would be so perfect. My response is "WTF?". My Aunt's response is "Well, she really likes you". My aunt is semi-crazy, but mostly of the harmless variety, so I just change the subject.

Not longer after that, Interference gets FB. She friends me. I accept, because at that time, I accepted nearly everybody who FB messages me (I've been FB friends with her son since we met). I log on to find a message on my wall (with lots of comments), where Interference tells me how much she misses me (a person she's ever seen twice in her life) and how she knows I would have been SO GOOD to her son, and how she wishes he was marrying me. Her son comments on her post about how shitty it is for her to post that and THEN THEY HAVE A FIGHT ON MY FB WALL. I take the whole thing down, and tell Interference that I'm not comfortable with this, and to stay off my wall with stuff like that. She apologizes, but says it's just so upsetting to see a quality woman such as myself not end up with her son (???).

Over the next few years, she occasionally continues to post things about her son on my FB. She likes a lot of my posts. She tags him when I mention doing something that he'd like too. Meanwhile, her son and I haven't spoken in YEARS at this point. Slowly, I don't let her see things on my wall, and my FB use trickles off greatly, so I forget all about this shit.

Until this weekend. Son messages me. He's is in town doing a weekend vacation with his wife & daughter; he'd love suggestions on stuff for them to do. I give him some. He asks if I'd like to grab lunch. I say "sure". It seems a bit weird, and honestly, I'm surprised his wife wants anything to do with me (I assume she knows exactly who I am), but whatevs. It'll be nice to have lunch.

Except that INTERFERENCE is there too! Which he didn't mention. Surprise! Turns out, she paid for the trip, and SHE wanted me to go out to lunch with them. She spends the ENTIRE lunch making little catty comments at the level that I'm like...can I call her on any of this shit? Stuff like how I've aged sooooooo amazingly well in the last 10 years (I legit have; people regularly under guess my age by 8-10 years), and it's such a shame that not everybody ages as well as I have (Wife definitely hadn't). Wife is, BTW, at first confused as to who I am. I see when she cottons on. She seems to be swinging between hurt and furious.

Son is like...oblivious? Or has Stockholm Syndrome? He's got this shiny smile going on, and a kinda blank look. He keeps complimenting his wife and trying to talk her up, and I spend all my time agreeing with all the talking up on his wife, even as Interference keeps trying to get me to talk about myself, which I keep demurring on.

Their daughter caught on that something weird was going on, but couldn't tell what.

And I honestly wasn't sure how to extricate myself, even though I KNEW what that bag of shit was doing, it just didn't seem overt enough to call out.

When we go our separate ways (after turning down Interference's repeated entreaties to join them in their sight-seeing), Interference hugs me and whispers "There are enough cracks there for you to work your way in, if you still want to". I pull back, stare at her, and say "No. Absolutely not. And you should be ashamed of yourself". She looks stunned. I leave.

The first thing I do when I get home is fully block her and her son on FB. Her because fuck her. Him because I don't want to be anywhere near whatever the fuck is happening there. I mean, good on him for talking up his wife, but why did he even ask me to lunch? Did he really not think it'd be a shit show? His poor fucking wife.

The second thing I do is call my aunt and tell her that if she gets a call from Interference about me, I want to hear exactly NOTHING about it.

I don't know what the fuck was up with this lady and her obsession with getting her son and me together, but after meeting him only once TEN PLUS YEARS AGO and then him getting MARRIED TO THE MOTHER OF HIS CHILD, you'd think she'd be able to leaving it the fuck alone.